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May 9, 2010

Top 10: Ways To Be A Real Man (only for man)


No.10 - Learn to talk the talk

If you're tired of your thoughts falling on deaf ears, ameliorate your speech with as much literature as you can eyeball. Novels, biographies, magazines, and newspapers will help you build a more developed vocabulary.

No.9 - Get the news

Short of reading the news, there is a lazy man's solution: watch news channels. The talking heads that feature prominently on 24-hour news networks are typically very polished and have a superior command of the language you'd like to speak better. Listening to them frequently will help you do just that.

While you're at it, forget lame catchphrases like "it's all good," "don't go there" and "you da man"/ "dei macha" from your vocabulary altogether. These buzz sayings had a place in the pop culture lexicon of the late '90s, but have since been exhausted by mall rats and MTV VJs.

No.8 - Develop your voice

While the tone and pitch of your voice are mostly out of your control, we have it on good authority that a squeaky voice isn't an aphrodisiac. If you tend to hit the high notes, try imitating Harrison Ford and Clint Eastwood. Now those guys can talk.

No.7 - Hit the gym

Maintain some level of physical fitness. Don't have the time to be a chiseled underwear model? Who does? You don't need all that tone and bulk to be her Adonis. Sticking to a workout program designed by somebody who spends their days racking your weights will make you look better in clothes -- the first step in getting a woman out of hers. Furthermore, your general disposition will surge as endorphins are released through routine exercise. Your performance on the job, in the bedroom and wherever else you do your thing will also get a boost because of increased motor coordination and mental clarity. There are no downsides to being physically fit except for the discipline required to maintain it.

No.6 - Foot the bill

When on a date, always insist on picking up the tab. Despite a feeble grab for her Kate Spade purse, she really has very little intention of paying. This delicate scenario is best handled with just three clutch words: "I got it."

No.5 - Forget the past

Don't inquire about your girlfriend's past. That kind of knowledge could send you into a tailspin of doubt and jealousy. No matter who she is, there are skeletons in her closet. Want to know about the time four frat boys ran a train on your special little angel? Didn't think so. Refrain from broaching the subject altogether and concentrate on what really matters: you and her in this moment.

No.4 - Don't write anything

Love letters? Big mistake. Women want men, not carbon copies of themselves.

No.3 - Drink hard

drink like a man.

No.2 - Shake (hands) with authority

Your handshake gives you away. So what does yours say about you? Firm and assertive or weak and submissive? Never has a first impression faux pas been more telling than interlocking hands with a dead fish. Right away your future employer or father-in-law will be left to wonder if there is any substance behind that loosey-goosey grip.

No.1 - Look 'em in the eye

If etiquette were a family, then eye contact would be the first cousin to the handshake. Not maintaining it is equivalent to a confession of guilt. No one will actually come out and accuse you of being culpable, but if you can't look somebody directly in the eye, they'll reason that you have something to hide. You may be of the noblest intentions, but if you can't stand cornea to cornea with a man, your integrity will be in doubt.

Lay any objections to rest by making a strong handshake and knowing gaze your standard operating procedure

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