July 31, 2010
July 30, 2010
How to annoy your roommate?
1. Smoke weed. Do whatever comes naturally.
2. Switch the sheets on your beds while she/he is at class.
3. Twitch a lot.
4. Pretend to talk while pretending to be asleep.
5. Steal a fishtank. Fill it with beer and dump sardines in it. Talk to them.
8. Learn to levitate. While your roommate is looking away, float up out of your seat. When s/he turns to look, fall back down and grin.
9. Speak in tongues.
10. Move you roommate's personal effects around. Start subtlely. Gradually work up to big things, and eventually glue everything s/he owns to the ceiling.
11. Walk and talk backwards.
12. Spend all your money on Jolt Cola. Drink it all. Stack the cans in the middle of your room. Number them.
13. Spend all your money on Transformers. Play with them at night. If your roommate says anything, tell him/her with a straight face, "They're more than meets the eye."
16. Collect all your urine in a small jug.
17. Chain yourself to your roommate's bed. Get him/her to bring you food.
18. Get a computer. Leave it on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.
19. Ask your roommate if your family can move in "just for a couple of weeks."
21. Fake a heart attack. When your roommate gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.
22. Eat glass.
23. Smoke ballpoint pens.
24. Smile. All the time.
25. Collect dog shit in baby food jars. Sort them according to what you think the dog ate.
26. Burn all your waste paper while eying your roommate suspiciously.
27. Hide a bunch of potato chips and Ho Hos in the bottom of a trash can. When you get hungry, root around in the trash. Find the food, and eat it. If your roommate empties the trash before you get hungry, demand that she/he reimburse you.
28. Leave a declaration of war on your roommate's desk. Include a list of grievances.
30. Shoot rubber bands at your roommate while his/her back is turned, and then look away quickly.
31. Dye all your underwear lime green.
32. Spill a lot of beer on his/her bed. Swim.
33. Bye three loaves of stale bread. Grow mold in the closet.
34. Hide your underwear and socks in your roommate's closet. Accuse him/her of stealing it.
35. Remove your door. Ship it to your roommate's parents (postage due).
37. Whenever your roommate walks in, wait one minute and then stand up. Announce that you are going to take a shower. Do so. Keep this up for three weeks.
38. Array thirteen toothbrushes of different colors on your dresser. Refuse to use them.
39. Paint your half of the room black.
40. Whenever he/she is about to fall asleep, ask questions that start with "Didja ever wonder why...." Be creative.
41. Shave one eyebrow.
42. Put your mattress underneath your bed. Sleep down under there and pile your dirty clothes on the empty bedframe. If your roommate comments, mutter "Gotta save space," twenty times while twitching violently.
43. Put horseradish in your shoes.
44. Shelve all your books with the spines facing the wall. Complain loudly that you can never find the book that you want.
45. Always flush the toilet three times.
46. Subsist entirely on pickles for a week. Vomit often.
50. Open your window shades before you go to sleep each night. Close them as soon as you wake up.
2. Switch the sheets on your beds while she/he is at class.
3. Twitch a lot.
4. Pretend to talk while pretending to be asleep.
5. Steal a fishtank. Fill it with beer and dump sardines in it. Talk to them.
8. Learn to levitate. While your roommate is looking away, float up out of your seat. When s/he turns to look, fall back down and grin.
9. Speak in tongues.
10. Move you roommate's personal effects around. Start subtlely. Gradually work up to big things, and eventually glue everything s/he owns to the ceiling.
11. Walk and talk backwards.
12. Spend all your money on Jolt Cola. Drink it all. Stack the cans in the middle of your room. Number them.
13. Spend all your money on Transformers. Play with them at night. If your roommate says anything, tell him/her with a straight face, "They're more than meets the eye."
16. Collect all your urine in a small jug.
17. Chain yourself to your roommate's bed. Get him/her to bring you food.
18. Get a computer. Leave it on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.
19. Ask your roommate if your family can move in "just for a couple of weeks."
21. Fake a heart attack. When your roommate gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.
22. Eat glass.
23. Smoke ballpoint pens.
24. Smile. All the time.
25. Collect dog shit in baby food jars. Sort them according to what you think the dog ate.
26. Burn all your waste paper while eying your roommate suspiciously.
27. Hide a bunch of potato chips and Ho Hos in the bottom of a trash can. When you get hungry, root around in the trash. Find the food, and eat it. If your roommate empties the trash before you get hungry, demand that she/he reimburse you.
28. Leave a declaration of war on your roommate's desk. Include a list of grievances.
30. Shoot rubber bands at your roommate while his/her back is turned, and then look away quickly.
31. Dye all your underwear lime green.
32. Spill a lot of beer on his/her bed. Swim.
33. Bye three loaves of stale bread. Grow mold in the closet.
34. Hide your underwear and socks in your roommate's closet. Accuse him/her of stealing it.
35. Remove your door. Ship it to your roommate's parents (postage due).
37. Whenever your roommate walks in, wait one minute and then stand up. Announce that you are going to take a shower. Do so. Keep this up for three weeks.
38. Array thirteen toothbrushes of different colors on your dresser. Refuse to use them.
39. Paint your half of the room black.
40. Whenever he/she is about to fall asleep, ask questions that start with "Didja ever wonder why...." Be creative.
41. Shave one eyebrow.
42. Put your mattress underneath your bed. Sleep down under there and pile your dirty clothes on the empty bedframe. If your roommate comments, mutter "Gotta save space," twenty times while twitching violently.
43. Put horseradish in your shoes.
44. Shelve all your books with the spines facing the wall. Complain loudly that you can never find the book that you want.
45. Always flush the toilet three times.
46. Subsist entirely on pickles for a week. Vomit often.
50. Open your window shades before you go to sleep each night. Close them as soon as you wake up.
July 28, 2010
My priorities in life
Its been some time since I opened this blog and blogged about entertainment news, jokes and many more but I did not have the time to write my own article in this blog. Yes, being alone in a foreign land makes us wonder about all the good things that we missed to give our priority upon.It goes along with the saying that you will not appreciate something until you lost it.Yes,I have to really go down with that.
Let me explain what are the top priorities in life that every person should have.I read this article from internet that actually struck my mind to think the priorities in our lives. In an era that tells us to keep rushing, from the time we are children until cruising through the milestones of life, it’s hard to keep our priorities straight.
In order to properly prioritize our lives, we need to take a step back and reassess where we are investing your time and energy. Alongside this, in my opinion, it becomes quite beneficial to keep ourselves accountable for every single decision we make.
At this point in my life, I feel that it makes most sense to prioritize ourselves in this order.
1. Health
2. Relationships
3. Career and Purpose
4. Fun & Satisfaction
Health-keeping ourselves fit and in shape is very important.Physical exercises such as cardiovascular trainings, football, basketball, swimming and so on are crucial recipes of a healthy body that ensures sharper mind and happier life. Regular schedules of sleeping and eating should be maintained.More than anything, do not be so obsessed over your health. Moderate exercises should be followed and enjoyed.It reminds me of this quote by Josh Billings,“There’s lots of people who spend so much time watching their health, they haven’t got time to enjoy it.”
Relationships-Family, friends, and people that we care about seem to be a logical secondary life priority after we take care of ourselves. In fact, studies have shown that people who show regular compassion or generosity to others are more likely to be happy and satisfied with their own life goals and accomplishments. Maintaining positive relationships with the people we love is vitally important to a balanced life. Ultimately, though, do not spend too much time on people we do not care about, or people that always let us down. This sounds harsh, but such actions will only negatively impact our health and relationships overall.Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.
Career and Purpose -Rather than getting caught up in the crazy speed and confusion of the modern world, we need to challenge ourselves to make decisions according WHO and WHAT we want to be.At all costs, we should not remain stagnant or hesitant for too long. We can only learn more about ourselves, and more about our purpose, by moving around and trying various things.It is a fascinating and inspiring rundown about life purpose we should check out.
Michael Jordan once said that, “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
Fun & Satisfaction - Don’t live for tomorrow, live for today. Enjoy life. Pleasure is so important and brings the cycle of life priorities back to our own personal health and well-being.Have fun with people, marvel at the beauty of the natural world, listen to music, develop your hobbies, travel, and play around with the idea of satisfaction.
“Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery.And today?Today is a gift.That’s why we call it the present.
I hope all of us can get our priorities right and be the best that we can be in our daily lives.
mamalado